Friday, January 27, 2006

Ask Kevin!

As a selfless philanthropist as well as an absolute authority on everything there is to know (and a few things that aren't to know), I will regularly share with you a few specks of knowledge from the boundless reserve of my intellect. You may submit questions about anything in the comments section of this post, and I will answer them regularly. Obviously, this idea is completely and totally original. Our first question comes from Eric:
If the sky's blue is a refraction from the ocean and water is clear, where does the blue come from? -Eric
The blue is actually caused by the bending of light in the atmosphere. Light from the sun contains the full spectrum of light, but a gas in the upper atmosphere called Cobalt Thorium G released by the Soviet Union during the Cold War in an attempt to wipe out all non-communistic life on Earth reflects most wavelengths of sunlight back into space except for blue light and ultraviolet death rays that cause cancer. Before the Cold War the sky was actually white. The Soviet Union denied responsibility for turning the sky blue and formed a secret international communist cabal to covertly edit all photographs, paintings, and texts from before the incident. It appears that they succeeded.

There was no cancer before the incident either. It just comes to prove that, besides a certain individual, the Russians are to blame for nearly everything that is wrong with the world. Damn ruskies. God bless America!

6 Comments:

Anonymous Karen said...

Good luck on the SAT, Kevin!

Since you're not online anymore and I know you check this more than sane people do.

11:39 PM  
Blogger Eric said...

Oh! That explains everything! It's unfortunate that your intellect will be put to waste after you miss a single point on aforementioned SAT and end up a cardboard box mugger stealing cheeseburgers from people. But such tragedies help make up the fabric of human life, no?

12:22 AM  
Anonymous Vivian said...

*gags* SAT *chokes*
i must ask you if there are cases in which the SAT is to blame for teenagers' depression. and if that is true...i am convinced that the SAT is promoting suicide and is inconspicuously (need for a better word) killing America's teens. No wonder the Canadians are so happy...they don't have to take SATs

9:16 PM  
Blogger Kevin said...

Maybe the SATs are actually a Canadian conspiracy to drain the life out of the American youth so decades from now they can invade us and use our WMD's to take over the world.

8:53 PM  
Anonymous blue>white said...

whats the difference between a DVD that is silver on the bottom and one that is blue?

10:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Socrates is a man
And all men are mortal
Then so what?

12:01 AM  

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